ENGAGEMENT PARTIES:let the good times roll

Let it be known the countdown has started by kicking off the wedding festivities with an engagement party

The average length of an engagement is fourteen months — but you don’t have to wait that long to start celebrating. An engagement party is an opportunity to share the excitement of your pending marriage with friends and family in a relaxed setting before kicking into high-gear wedding-planning mode. However, the engagement party is relatively uncharted territory compared to other wedding-related events, and questions of where to have it, who should be invited — and whether to even have one at all — confuse many newly engaged couples.

Good Timing

Your engagement party should be spaced out from other events as much as possible. Too many events in a short time can be overwhelming for both you and your guests. Bridal showers are typically two to three months before the wedding, so if the wedding is any less than a year after your engagement, consider if it’s practical (and within your budget) to throw an engagement party.

If the thought of planning yet another blowout to celebrate your union has your head spinning, don’t worry. Having an engagement party is not a necessity — and it isn’t practical for everyone. If you already had too much to do in a relatively short amount of time, it may be excessive to have yet another party.

ESTABLISHING A PLAN

From intimate dinners for the two families to blowout bashes that include the entire wedding guest list — anything goes for an engagement party. The number of couples having engagement parties has dramatically increased in the past 10 years, and they are becoming larger and more elaborate than ever before. Even a casual event at a relative’s home is often catered and may sometimes include live music. 

Couples should think about what they hope to accomplish with the party. The purpose of smaller engagement parties is for the two families to formally come together for the first time. For bigger affairs, it’s just the first pre-wedding celebration. There are no strict rules about where it should be held, or who should host or send out invitations. Traditionally, it was the bride’s parents — similar to the wedding — but now, any parent, relative, close friend, or the couple themselves can host. 

There are also no strict rules about who should be invited. Allow the type of event to dictate who should be invited.

When inviting guests from out of town, you should consider that traveling to yet another event could be difficult. If you’d like them to be there, extend the invitation, but make sure they know it’s okay if they can’t make it. A skilled stationer writer can assist you in finding the right wording to express this.

Setting the Mood

From Sunday brunches at a local museum, to sit-down dinners in a hotel ballroom, there are a variety of locations open to engagement parties. Having an engagement party at someone’s home may set a less formal, more intimate tone, but can be a burden to the host. Hiring a caterer can take stress off everyone. So much work goes into planning a wedding, and this should be a time for everyone to relax and enjoy themselves — so let someone else tend to the details.

When choosing music, it’s important to think about the mood you want to create. Music shouldn’t make it difficult for guests to mingle — a pianist, guitarist, flutist or harpist can add to the ambience without taking over. Because an engagement party is typically more subdued than a wedding reception, a full band or a DJ is rare but certainly not out of the question — if a night of smokin’ soul in the form of 45’s is what you and your fiancé want, then so be it!

A fabulous engagement party can set the mood for all the festivities to follow. And it’s an easy step towards bringing worlds together before the wedding, so you won’t have the added pressure of introducing everyone for the first time on the big day!