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Personalized
Vows
Put your own stamp on the commitment
you’re about to make to each other!
You’ve heard everyone say ‘the gown
is the star of the show.’ And you can’t imagine what your ceremony would be
like without the old world architecture of your site. But what’s most important
at your ceremony, is what’s said.
If you’re writing your own vows,
don't wait until the last minute to get started. Set aside one to two months to
work on them and have the final version ready no later than two days before the
wedding. Here are a few guidelines to help make your words as beautiful and
unique as the love that you are celebrating.
CONSULT THE STANDARDS: Even
if you’ve decided against conventional vows, it’s still helpful to use them as
a starting point. Ask your officiant to give you some examples of vows that
would normally be used in your venue, and build from there.
GO IT ALONE?: Decide if you
want to say separate vows, or if you’d rather each recite an identical,
all-encompassing vow that you compose together. If you choose to make it a
joint task, pen a mutual vow that you both take. Or, create a fill-in-the blank
model for each one of you to personalize.
MAKE IT PERSONAL: Use
special memories to look at the past and think about the future. Try to
incorporate a meaningful anecdote about what brought the two of you together
mention how you met, your first date, the proposal, and anything in between.
SOMETHING BORROWED: Look
for inspiration from the myriad of love songs and sonnets available. From
Shakespeare to Sinatra, there’s plenty of inspiration and quotable material out
there. Jot down words and phrases that capture your feelings, and use them as a
springboard.
SHORT & SWEET: Your
wedding vows are the most important element of your ceremony, but don’t make
them too long. No matter how gorgeous your prose, your audience may start to
squirm if you ramble on. A good rule of thumb is to keep them to approximately
one minute.
lHAVE
FUN: Generally the exchange of vows is a serious part of the ceremony, but it
doesn’t have to be. Be creative and let your personalities shine through.
Before you both begin writing, decide on the tone you want to set and have fun!
Some couples may object to the
sentiment expressed in the vows that a wife should, " love, honor, and
obey"
her husband, as though she is his property. If the line that
proclaims them as " man and wife" is also objectionable, " husband
and wife" is an easy alternative. Remember, these lines can easily be
changed without sacrificing any of the love symbolized by the wedding vows
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